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Hi Brad (if that's still you taking care of international amusement),
hope you like this. Hope it's not too much like yet another cheap
Murphy imitation. I wrote some 50 articles on RPG and the stuff down
here is, you might say, the essence-made-word.
My e-mail is lucas@severus.mbfys.kun.nl or just lucas@mbfys.kun.nl
Bye there.
Crimson's Laws of Adventure
---
Any creature encountered must be presumed hostile
until proved helpful
***
The threat posed by your opponent is
directly proportional to the detail
involved in its graphical description
***
The threat posed by your opponent is inversely proportional
to the innocence of its graphical description
(i.e. the Wizened Old Man is the meanest creature around)
***
The safety of a structure is
inversely proportional to its apparent sturdiness
***
A fatal blow from an opponent will always come
at the most dangerous moment
***
A fatal blow from an opponent will always strike
at the most vulnerable member of a group
***
The probability of the presence of a secret door
or exit is inversely proportional to
the exlusiveness of your surroundings
(i.e. there is much more chance of finding a secret closet in an
"ordinary kitchen" than in the "Grand Hall of Tournaments")
***
Don't ever look in mirrors. Adventurers are invariably
depicted as images of their programmers; i.e. they are always
small, skinny, ugly, bald, etcetera. Freud would have had the
time of his life examining adventure-programmers.
***
The last door in a set of 24 identical doors
is always a one-way device
***
The last door in a set of 24 identical doors
always leads to the Dragon's Lair
***
All treasure must always be accepted except
that which is not explicitly guarded
Such treasure must either be left alone, or destroyed
Decide what is the logical thing to do,
then do it the other way around
This may not always work, but it IS the best approach
***
The only good Troll is a dead Troll
***
Trolls regenerate - There are no dead Trolls
***
The chance of a monster being asleep
is directly proportional to the acuteness of its ears
***
The most important adversaries are never surprised
***
The complexity of a riddle is
inversely proportional to the bonus earned by its solution
***
Poison: All snakes are poisonous
If it has a sting, it's poisonous
If it looks healthy, it's poisonous
If it looks poisonous, it's fatal
***
If it looks safe, friendly or valuable - run!
***
Gods can be trusted, but not defeated
-----
Lucas van den Berg
And some stuff for MUD players:
No it's not fair but you are the only one who must sleep.
All monsters invariably suffer from chronic insomnia.
You always get killed when you are within 5% of the xp
needed to get you to the next level.
You always get killed at the one time you did NOT join
a group. Look on the bright side: you save rent!
If there are four ways to run when you flee, YOU run
into the death-trap. But: you save rent!
Lagging always happens when you are under attack.
Losing your link always happens right before the auto-save.
MUDs are the places where death is the most expensive
kick of them all.
Happy Hunting,
lucas@severus.mbfys.kun.nl
(From the "Rest" of RHF)
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